The Art of Deception
by welcometonerdworld
Summary: Lily didn't really plan on falling for James whilst pretending to date him to get back at her sister, but she supposes that's all part of the art of deception. Cover art by viria.


It was all Petunia's fault, really.

Hers and James Potter's.

It had begun on the sort of morning where the sun is shining, birds are tweeting and nothing can possibly go wrong in the world. Lily, being on her summer holidays, had absolutely no concept of time, and therefore awoke somewhere around midday, stretching languidly in her comfy bed and yawning.

Once downstairs, she was faced with a particularly grouchy Petunia.

The argument went something like this. Lily, munching on a piece of toast, asked, "How was your date last night?"

Petunia looked up from her newspaper and snapped, "Oh my _god_, why are you so insensitive? You and your freakish crap and your weird magic –"

"Um, sorry, I –"

"Jesus, Lily, no one ever asked for your opinion, why'd you have to be so annoying all the time?"

Lily scowled, and in a sardonic tone, "Well, I'm _sorry_, all I did was ask one question about your relationship –"

Petunia huffed, "Do you really want to know? Do you? I told Vernon about your witchy rubbish and he didn't believe me, and then we had a massive argument and everything's ruined and –"

"Why did you argue? If he loves you he won't mind." Lily said, thinking (not for the first time) that Vernon must have been the worst boyfriend in the entire universe.

"What, won't mind that you're a freak? Of course he does. As if you even know anything about it –" Petunia paused, flicking her long blonde hair obnoxiously. Lily scoffed.

Her sister continued, "– like you could ever get a boyfriend anyway."

At least, that was how an extremely irritated Lily recalled the dispute. She stood up, said a few choice words to her sister (something along the lines of _what the fuck_, _of course I can_, _ugh_) and stormed to the kitchen, only to find that there was no milk left as the cat had had it all that morning.

Grabbing some coins from the counter and shoving her feet into the first pair of shoes she saw – which, incidentally, were Petunia's – Lily stomped out of the house, slamming the door behind her, making sure to scuff the shoes as she walked.

Her fury began to ebb away the further she got from her house, and by the time Lily reached the corner shop she could hardly even remember why they'd had the argument. The sky was simply too blue and the day too warm for her bad mood to remain for long.

She picked up a two pint of milk and paid quickly, turning to leave. She had just spun around and taken three steps back down the road when a voice shouted out to her.

"Lily?"

Lily turned. The voice was male, and strangely familiar, although she couldn't quite put her finger on who exactly it was…

"James?"

She spotted him then. He was sat on the opposite side of the road, seated on a wooden bench and waving at her. Lily was certain that she'd never seen anything as strange as James Potter, Quidditch Extraordinaire and pureblood, sitting in the middle of Muggle suburbia.

She crossed the road hastily, jogging over to him, where she was met with a wide grin and a one armed hug. He was holding a map of her hometown, Cokeworth.

"What on earth are you doing here?"

"Thought I'd bother you for the day. You aren't busy, are you?"

"No, you're fine."

Lily had recently developed a close friendship with James, on account of a few factors – one, because he had matured a lot and Lily appreciated his sense of humour, two, because they were house mates and she was friends with all of his and vice versa, and three, because they'd been paired up in Ancient Runes at the end of their sixth year and had to suffer through an entire project together.

All of that, in tandem with the fact that James Potter was also very attractive, meant that Lily was pretty pleased to see him, if not surprised.

"Where are the others?" Lily asked, in reference to Sirius, Remus and Peter, best friends of James who were almost always seen together.

"Sirius has a really bad case of hay-fever, and he refuses to leave the house. I've been going mental with all his whinging, and then he told me to piss off and visit Pete, but he's on holiday in the country. Oh, and Remus' furry little problem is making an appearance, so he doesn't want me at his either."

"So you figured you'd bug me instead?" She grinned, and he nodded.

"Pretty much. Not that you're my last resort, or anything."

She snorted. "Of course not."

There was a brief pause as she studied him, all long limbs and messy hair and bright eyes behind his glasses. He spoke, "So…what d'you want to do?"

Lily frowned. Then, a thought struck her – a brainwave, if you will, because if you asked Lily it was just about the best idea she'd had in a while.

"I need you to come to my house."

James raised an eyebrow. "What, am I going to have to meet your parents?"

"Oh, um –" She paused, frowning, "I dunno. They might be around later. That's okay, right?"

"Are you kidding?" He asked, before breaking out into a grin, "I have so many stories to tell them. Their little Lily, and all the mischief she gets up to at school…"

"Like what?"

"Like that time you pranked McGonagall. Or when you made all our ties Slytherin for the day."

"Ah, that's not too bad."

"Or the time when Remus found you snogging Diggory. In a broom cupboard. When you were meant to be patrolling."

"_James!_"

Eyes sparkling with mischief and a smirk on his lips, he laughed, "Come off it, Lily, d'you really think I'd tell them that? I don't want to scar them for life."

"Piss off," she scowled, before giving him a reluctant smile, "Anyway. I need you to do me a favour at my house."

"Sure."

She paused then, looking at him. Trying not to marvel at his willingness, his eagerness and loyalty and unfailing enthusiasm…

"…Lily?"

"Oh, sorry," she took a deep breath, "I need you to pretend to be my boyfriend."

"What?"

* * *

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" James bit his lip.

"Yes." Lily was determined, looking not at him but straight down the road, walking so quickly that even he and his long legs had to speed up to stay in step with her.

"Is she really going to fall for this, though?"

Lily had explained the entire argument to James, becoming more and more annoyed as she repeated it. James, for his part, played the 'outraged friend' well, saying _I can't believe she said that_, and _of course you can get a boyfriend!_ The latter statement had caused him to agree to the entire plan, and so the pair of them were now halfway back to Lily's house.

"We're going to be _very_ convincing," she said darkly. James gulped. The last thing he wanted to do was make a bad impression on Lily's family, but she was damn stubborn. There was no changing her mind once she'd settled on something, especially not where her sister was concerned.

Lily informed him of her cunning plan as they reached her house. James was tempted to make a 'you should have been a Slytherin' joke, given her master plan's complexity, but stopped himself – she was already in a bad mood.

Stood two houses away from Lily's, they paused. Lily leant up, ruffled his hair, adjusted his glasses and made him put on the leather jacket that he was carrying, in spite of the twenty five degree heat.

Are you sure you're okay with this?" she asked hesitantly, just before he left her. She didn't really want to force him into something that would make him uncomfortable, even if it was the best way to get back at Petunia.

He broke out into a characteristic smirk, "Are you kidding, Evans? I'm all for a bit of mischief making." He winked once, and spun on his heel. Lily was admiring the way his leather jacket sat on his shoulders (she had refrained from telling him that the reason she wanted him to wear it was because she and Petunia shared an obsession with a Muggle singer who always wore a leather jacket), when James turned into the path leading to her house.

She watched surreptitiously, crouched behind the wall of her neighbour's front garden, as James rang the doorbell and waited. Lily counted for one second, two, three, and then a thumping of feet could be faintly heard. The door opened, and she strained her ears to catch the conversation that ensued.

"Hi," said James, hand flying to his hair and ruffling. Lily grinned, hiding her smile behind a hand despite her hidden position.

"Hello," said Petunia. Although Lily couldn't quite see her sister, she knew that Petunia's voice held a touch of suspicion – after all, Cokeworth wasn't a big place, and the two girls were unaccustomed to unknown teenage boys showing up at their door.

"Is Lily here?"

Lily fervently wished she could see her sister's face, but she imagined that Petunia looked mildly horrified that an attractive boy wanted to see her sister instead of her. "No," she said, snapping, "Who exactly are you?"

"James Potter," he said, and with that edge of cockiness that drove Lily mad, he leant against the doorframe, "Her boyfriend."

"Lily doesn't have a boyfriend," was Petunia's immediate reaction. Lily's blood boiled and she gritted her teeth – she didn't, of course, actually have a boyfriend, but she didn't like the idea that Petunia _assumed_ she didn't.

"Uh, I'm pretty sure she does. She's been snogging me for at least a term now."

She felt her face flush, even though neither James nor Petunia could see her, as she imagined what exactly snogging James Potter would be like…

"A term? You go to her freak school?"

"Freak school? What d'you mean?" James sounded confused, and Lily felt guilty, thinking that she hadn't let on just how anti-magic her sister was.

"Your magic school," she sneered.

"What, Hogwarts? Yeah, I'm in her house."

Lily had to stifle a snort; as if Petunia would know what that meant.

"…you're going to have to wait outside for Lily, I can't just let anyone in."

That was her cue. Lily had foreseen that there was no way in hell that Petunia would let a random, leather jacket wearing adolescent male into their house. She sprung up from behind the brick wall and strode down the street, still carrying the bottle of milk as if she'd just returned from the shop.

She tried to be convincing, reaching into her pocket for her house key and then freezing as she caught sight of James, who had turned to smile at her as she walked down the road.

"James?" she asked in mock disbelief, grinning widely, "What are you doing here?"

"Thought I'd visit you for the day."

Lily, attempting to play the part of besotted girlfriend, fluttered her eyelashes deliberately as if surprised to see her sister standing there. "Oh, Tuney, this is James Potter."

"So I've heard," Petunia said, looking as if she'd swallowed a lemon, "Who is he?"

"My boyfriend, of course," Lily said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. She turned back to James, relishing in Petunia's astounded face. Then, to really seal the deal, she took three steps forwards, smiled at him (in a hopefully reassuring way), and pressed a light kiss to his lips.

Butterflies erupting in her stomach at the simple touch of her lips to his, she pulled away quickly, shooting him a nervous smile. He seemed slightly bewildered, but recovered speedily and returned her grin, before throwing a lazy arm across her shoulders and pulling her into his side.

Lily looked up at him, hugging his waist with one arm and still holding the milk with the other. She was just thinking about how it was pretty nice to be tucked under James Potter's arm, snuggling into his leather jacket and being enveloped in his scent that was somehow identical to the fresh grass on the Quidditch pitch, when Petunia cleared her throat pointedly.

"Oh, sorry, Tuney," Lily said in false surprise, like she'd entirely forgotten her sister was there, "Come on, James, I'll show you my room."

With a bright smile to Petunia, as if their argument that morning had never even happened, Lily dragged James inside her house, leaving a shocked Petunia standing in the doorway.

* * *

Once safely inside Lily's room, the pretence was dropped. Lily let go of James' hand and moved further into her room, sitting on her bed and watching him nervously as he took it all in. She was suddenly very aware of the fact that James was (if what Sirius told her was true) extremely rich and lived in a mansion of sorts, and that his bedroom was probably three times the size of hers.

A grin quickly spread across his face as he looked around, and his eyes landed on a spot near Lily's bed, on the floor. She turned her head to see what he was staring at and nearly screamed; it was a bright blue butterfly adorned bra. Lily stood quickly and grabbed it, shoving it into her open cupboard and slamming the doors.

"Not a word," she threatened, as James bit his lip to stop himself from laughing.

"I like your room," he said, as a way of changing the subject, "You have a lot of books."

"What? Oh, yeah," Lily shrugged, looking at her overflowing shelves, stuffed with fairy tales from her childhood and her favourite Muggle classics all the way to her sixth year textbooks. Not wanting him to stand uncomfortably in the middle of the room, Lily patted the space beside her on the bed. He walked over and perched next to her, and a heavy silence fell between them.

Lily thought she'd better address what had happened downstairs before the awkwardness killed her. "Sorry about kissing you, by the way," she began, trying to sound nonchalant. She, of course, wasn't really sorry about it at all, but thought she'd better say it anyway, "I really wanted to convince her."

She missed the way his face fell for a split second, before he brightened, "It's alright. I think she fell for it, anyway. Looked pretty stunned."

"I know, it was great," Lily grinned, recalling her sister's gaping mouth and raised eyebrows. Then, shyly, "Thanks for doing this, James."

He rolled his eyes good naturedly. "I told you already, I don't mind. It's not every day Lily Evans asks you to be her fake boyfriend," he smirked, and Lily flushed.

"Well. It's good of you, anyway. Although I don't know what we're going to do when my parents get home."

They began to plot Step Two of Lily's master plan: Fool the Parents. Step One: Get Petunia Back was pretty much completed, but in order to really piss her off, they had to ensure that Lily's parents _loved_ James. The art of deception was difficult, but it was one she was determined to master.

They were just laughing at the idea of James bonding with Lily's dad over their common love of treacle tart when there was a creaking sound just outside the bedroom door.

The pair of them froze. "It's Petunia," Lily hissed, eyes growing wide. She chewed on her lip nervously, and then whispered, "James."

"Yeah?"

"Kiss me."

"What?"

She squished her mouth to his the moment she heard another creak on the stairs. This kiss was nothing like the one they had shared downstairs – where that one had been chaste, short and sweet, this one was hot, frantic and passionate. Lily tilted her head a fraction and slipped her tongue past his lips and across his inner cheek, just as one of James' hands came up to rest at her waist.

She hummed happily (half deliberately, half not) into his mouth, causing him to shiver and shift closer to her on the bed, and a second later Lily heard a loud sound of disgust coming from outside the room.

Lily opened her eyes a fraction and peered round James, just in time to see Petunia's revolted face leaving the doorway. She smirked triumphantly against James' lips, causing him to peck them once more before they broke apart.

She stared at him. "Well…" She cleared her throat self-consciously. The thing was that James Potter was actually a very good kisser, and this was something that she hadn't really taken into account when she'd come up with her master plan.

"That was nice," he said bluntly, shooting her a broad grin and stretching his arms above his head languidly. Lily tried not to stare at the sliver of tan skin that appeared when his t-shirt rode up, and failed miserably.

In search of a topic to keep away the awkwardness, Lily spoke. "Want to go watch TV?"

His reaction was hilarious; his eyes grew comically behind his glasses so that he resembled a startled owl. Lily would have laughed had it not been so damned cute. "You have one of those?"

She laughed and took his hand, blushing at the tingles she felt shoot up her fingers when she touched him, and led him downstairs, giggling obnoxiously when they passed Petunia's room.

* * *

Half an hour later, they were seated on the sofa, halfway through a rerun of an old Doctor Who episode. Lily had originally thought that this would be a good way to induct James into the world of Muggle television, since the Doctor was equally as peculiar as your average witch or wizard, but she soon found she was sorely mistaken. James, ever curious, had come up with a steady stream of questions as soon as Lily had turned on the telly.

She was just starting to get a tiny bit fed up of all his interrogation, no matter how adorable his eagerness was, because this particular episode was actually very good and Lily hadn't had the chance to watch it yet. Luckily, James seemed to sense that his questioning was slightly annoying (Lily guessed it might have had something to do with her shushing him) and fell silent.

They'd been watching in peace for five minutes, and it was just getting to the good bit where the Doctor finally worked out the crux of the problem – in this case, a Cyberman invasion – when a clicking sound echoed down the hallway. Lily stiffened.

"That will be my mum," she whispered to James.

He looked sideways at her, with an uncharacteristic nervousness, "Anything you want me to say?"

She gave him a little smile, curling into his side. Of its own accord, James' arm wrapped around her back, his hand resting on her waist. "Nah," she said, "Just be extra charming, okay?"

He grinned, ruffling his hair with his free hand just as footsteps sounded behind them, "I'll do my best."

"Lily? Who…?"

Lily craned her neck around to look at her mother, feigning surprise. "Oh, hi Mum! How was work?"

"What? Oh, it was alright, hardly any violets sold though…" She trailed off, blinking confusedly, "Who's this, Lily?"

"This is my boyfriend, Mum."

"Boyfriend?" Mrs Evans repeated.

James took this as his cue to move. "Hello, Mrs Evans," he said cheerfully, springing up from the sofa and walking around to shake her hand fervently. Lily repressed a snort at the sight of her five foot two mother looking up at James Potter's six foot one form. "Lovely to meet you, I'm James Potter."

Mrs Evans' eyebrows rose. "James Potter?"

"Yes, that's right."

"Okay…" she gave Lily a funny look. Lily had forgotten that she and James hadn't always been friends, and recalled now that she might have written a few letters to her parents that did not paint him in such a lovely light. "Well, it's nice to meet you, James. Will you be staying for dinner?"

"Um…I'd love to, thanks."

"Wonderful," she said, smiling genuinely up at him. She turned to her daughter. "Lily, will you help me with dinner please?"

Lily thought about complaining and making Petunia do it, but she felt guilty – her mother hadn't known that James would be coming (although, neither had Lily), so she should probably help out. After all, she was only home for a few months per year.

"Sure, Mum," she said, standing.

"Do you need any help?" James offered, "I haven't cooked a lot, but I'd love to try…"

Lily cringed at the memory of the last time she had caught him trying to bake some cookies in the kitchens for Remus (they had turned out burnt to a crisp on account of the fact that James had fallen asleep in front of the oven), and was grateful when her mum replied, "Oh, thank you James, but you're our guest! Please, you're welcome to watch the telly whilst Lily and I get the food ready."

With that, she turned, marching into the kitchen and beckoning Lily to follow. Lily threw James an apologetic smile and made her way into the kitchen. When she entered, Mrs Evans was already stood with her hands on her hips, her best 'I'm disappointed' face on.

"I'm sorry, Mum," Lily said first, trying to placate her mother before an argument could start, "I didn't know he was visiting today."

"I'm not angry about that, Lily," her mother said, turning to the fridge and pulling out ingredients, "I just wish you'd told me you had a boyfriend. You could have just mentioned it in one of your letters, you know."

Lily bit her lip. For starters, she was lying to her whole family, and on top of that, she hardly ever sent letters home anymore. "I really am sorry," she said, widening her green eyes (she'd inherited the puppy dog look from her dad, and it usually worked), "It's just been a bit mental, you know? I really like James and I didn't want you to be upset if it all went wrong."

"Oh, Lily," her mother said, her frown softening. She placed a hand on her daughter's shoulder, "I understand. You'll tell me everything now though, won't you?"

"Of course," Lily said, holding back a gulp. "His name is James Potter, and he's in my house – Gryffindor – he's Captain of the Quidditch team and something of a Transfiguration prodigy…"

"Oh, none of that," her mum waved a hand in the air whilst chopping carrots. Lily started to boil some water in a pan as she frowned. Mrs Evans continued, "I want to know about your relationship!"

"Ah," Lily said, laughing nervously, "Well, I've sort of always fancied him. He used to be really annoying, bit of a toerag really, but he grew out of it. You might remember, from my letters…"

Her mum smiled, "Yes, I do remember a bit of complaining."

"Yeah. Well he's grown out of it, anyway, he's a lot more responsible and mature, even if he doesn't go a week without pranking someone. But our relationship…"

Lily tried to keep it short, she really did. But somehow talking about James always made her want to go on and on for hours, about his intelligence and his loyalty to his friends and his occasional sheer idiocy whenever he tried to be brave. She spun a story about how James had asked her out to Hogsmeade and they'd gone on a date – it was all very generic really. Lily couldn't help but think that if they really were dating, they would have a much more interesting story. (Perhaps even a story that began something along the lines of a fake date.)

* * *

Lily and her mother had just placed the dish inside the oven when Mr Evans arrived home. He came straight into the kitchen, pecked Mrs Evans on the lips and Lily on the forehead, and was just about to take an apple pie out of the cupboard when Lily's mother spoke.

"Lily's boyfriend is round for dinner, David."

He turned to gape at his daughter, "Boyfriend?"

Lily nodded sheepishly, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you before, Dad –"

"Never mind that," said Mr Evans, waving a hand in the air. It was uncanny how similar his hand movements were to Mrs Evans'. "Who is he?"

"His name's James, James Potter –"

"Right." With that, Mr Evans swept out of the room, storming into the living room. Lily thought about following and then thought again. Smirking, and feeling only a little guilty at James' bad luck, she pushed herself up to sit on the counter and continued to tell her mother all about her very gentlemanly fake boyfriend.

A few minutes later, the two boys entered the kitchen. Mr Evans looked – strangely enough – happy, with his arm around his daughter's supposed boyfriend, a slight smile on his face. James appeared a little uncomfortable, and Lily almost went over to congratulate him – she knew her dad could be a bit scary if he wanted to be. James was clearly holding his own though, looking Mr Evans right in the eye and describing something about Object to Animal Transfiguration.

"Why don't you two go wait in the living room until dinner's ready?" Mrs Evans suggested, gesturing to Lily and James.

Lily took James' hand, shooting a nervous glance at her dad (it's not every day your little girl brings home a teenage boy) before pulling him out of the room. Instead of leading him back to the living room, Lily turned into the corridor and started to climb the stairs.

They were almost in Lily's room when they heard Mrs Evans shout from the kitchen, "You'd better keep your door open, young lady!"

The pair of them blushed scarlet on the spot, and Lily almost laughed out loud at James' bewildered expression.

"Don't worry about it," she said in a low voice as they entered her bedroom, "Seems like they like you a lot."

James' eyebrows shot up, "Like me?" he repeated incredulously, "Your dad asked me all about my…intentions."

Lily groaned, covering her eyes with her hands. She peeked through her fingers to look at him. "And?"

"And what?"

"Well, what did you say?"

A sense of dread welled up inside her as she watched the smirk unfurl on James' face. "I might have just said…"

"James. Potter. What did you do?"

"Oh, nothing really," his mischievous look was starting to irritate her, and she hit him lightly on the arm. "Alright, alright. I kind of told him I was in love with you."

Lily's mouth fell open. "_James_. What the fuck?"

By this point, he was full out laughing at her stunned expression. "Oh come on, you have to admit it'll be really great for pissing off your sister. Your dad certainly didn't seem to mind me that much after I said that!"

Lily groaned, "But what about when we have to stage a breakup? It'll be so much worse if they think we're actually in love…"

James smirked infuriatingly. "I guess I'm just going to have to stick around, huh?"

She glared once more, "I'm only doing this to annoy Petunia."

"'Course you are."

"Just to piss her off until we get back to school."

"Naturally."

"It's only because it's convenient."

"Sure, Evans. Sure."

At his last remark, Lily flicked him on the nose, rolling her eyes. She wondered, not for the first time, if this was worth it, and then remembered how he'd kissed her before and figured that she could do a hell of a lot worse for a fake boyfriend.

* * *

Half an hour later was dinner, and Lily and James were called downstairs by Mrs Evans. Whilst in the corridor, James made a show of holding Lily's hand (in spite of the fact that no one was looking) as they went over the final parts of Lily's master plan that involved one charming James Potter and two impressed parents.

Lily was stunned, upon their arrival in the kitchen, to see that her mum had retrieved her better plates and matching cutlery sets for dinner. She felt a smug sense of satisfaction, as Mrs Evans had certainly never done such a thing when Vernon came for dinner, and sat down in between James and her mother, across from Petunia and Mr Evans.

Her sister, Lily saw, did not look happy at all. She appeared to be torn between glaring at the very shiny forks on the table and at James, who seemed oblivious to the obvious tension in the room. Lily broke it by offering her dad the pasta, who smiled at her gratefully.

"So, James," Mrs Evans said, whilst piling salad onto her plate, "Lily said you're on the Quidditch team?"

"Yeah," James replied, puffing his chest out just the slightest bit so that Lily was sure the action was quite unconscious, "I'm the Captain. I play Chaser, which means I have to score goals against the other team."

"Ah, a Chaser," said Mr Evans, nodding wisely, "And how is your team looking for next year?"

"Well, it's our last one, so I'd really like to get the Cup if I can. I've been holding practice at my house now and then over the summer, just to make sure no one gets rusty. Hopefully we'll have a good chance." He smiled, taking a bite of his food.

Lily jumped in eagerly, "I'm sure you've more than a good chance. You nearly got it last year, if it hadn't been for your Seeker crashing."

"Crashing?" Lily's mum repeated, eyebrows rising, "What happened?"

James begun to tell the story of how Gryffindor's Seeker had taken an unfortunate Bludger to the neck, causing her to fall off her broom, only to be caught by James. Lily was particularly appreciative of how her parents' expressions seemed to become increasingly impressed as James kept talking, his hands gesticulating rapidly as he spoke with enthusiasm. Petunia, on the other hand, was developing a habit of glowering at the side of James' head.

A lull in the conversation led James to attempt to talk to Petunia. While Lily was thankful for him trying, she was also weary of the fact that her sister could be very rude when she wanted to.

"So, Petunia, Lily tells me you've finished school?"

The way her sister pursed her lips reminded Lily inexpressibly of Professor McGonagall. She stifled this thought, not wanting to laugh as Petunia spoke in a civilised – albeit stilted – tone, "Yes. I'm a secretary."

James nodded, as if he knew exactly what on earth that meant, and shoved a potato in his mouth so that he wouldn't have to reply. Petunia made an unimpressed face and continued, "And I'm dating Vernon, Vernon Dursley. He's a junior executive."

"Ah," said James, "Very interesting. How long have you been together?"

"Several months," Petunia practically spat, and Lily didn't miss the glare that was sent her way. She'd almost forgotten that Petunia and Vernon had had an argument just last night on account of Lily being a witch, and despite herself, she felt a little ashamed. She never wanted her sister to be unhappy because of her, and having James here was probably making everything a lot worse.

Luckily, her father swooped in just in time, "James," he began hastily, eyes darting between his two daughters. He was well accustomed to the Evans temper, "What are your plans for after school?"

"Um." James hesitated. Lily knew what he wanted to say – there's a war coming, I'm going to fight – and was infinitely glad when he said instead, "I thought about going professional for a while. In Quidditch, I mean. But my parents were Aurors – like Muggle police, I think – and I really want to make a difference to the world. Not that Quidditch isn't important, of course. But they were an inspiration to me, and I'd like to follow them."

Mr and Mrs Evans glanced at each other briefly, noting James' use of the past tense. Suddenly, everything seemed a little darker in the room, a little colder. "That's lovely, James," Lily's mother said quietly. James gave a small smile.

That is, before Petunia opened her mouth again. "You're going to be what?"

"An Auror," James repeated, "Like the Muggle police."

"What do _your lot_ need police for? We've already got perfectly good police." Petunia said indignantly, as if she was in charge of the police and felt the need to defend them.

"I'm sure you do," said James, "But, well, our kind of police have magic, so we're able to fight against Dark Wizards."

Lily decided that now was probably a good time to step in, "We need people to fight against bad wizards and witches, like in the Muggle world."

"Well, seeing as you're all so odd, I'm not really surprised –"

"_Petunia_ –" Mrs Evans said in a warning tone.

Petunia ignored her, "You and your weird magic, it's no wonder that some of you are cracked in the head –"

Lily was pretty certain that her own eyebrows were halfway up her forehead. She knew Petunia was easily riled up, but this?

"Honestly, you're all freaks, the lot of you –"

"Petunia." Mr Evans said, loud voice echoing around the room. Lily held back a flinch as Petunia continued – now on a rampage, it seemed.

"I don't know why we even let you into our house, really, it's extremely dangerous given with what you're saying!" She was standing up now. With half horror, half fascination, Lily watched as James set his jaw and pulled himself out of his seat to his full height.

"Dangerous?" he repeated, "I just told you I want to _defend_ people, and you think I'm dangerous?"

"Not just you, the whole lot of you! You're all as bad as each other, with your freakish nonsense and your creepy school –"

"It is not _creepy_. And frankly, I really don't like how you're talking to us," James said, voice defiant. Lily was surprised that Petunia wasn't backing down, honestly.

"James, Petunia dear, I really think now is _not the time_." Lily's mother said, looking between them nervously. Lily's dad was pinching the bridge of his nose between two fingers like he was going to blow a fuse.

James, meanwhile, was still talking, "It's rude, really, how you're treating her. Your only sister, and you act like she's the dirt on your shoe, when Lily is one of the best people I know –"

She felt her face flush at this, because that was probably the nicest thing anyone had ever said to her, even if it wasn't direct. "James," she interrupted quietly, "It's okay."

Somehow, he heard her voice cut through the tension in the room. James let out a breath, his back curving slightly, his head drooping. "Sorry," he mumbled, avoiding her gaze, and Lily excused the two of them before anyone could get out another word.

She took his hand as they left the kitchen and climbed the stairs to her room once more. He was shaking – whether with fury or worry or even embarrassment, Lily wasn't sure. Once inside, her bedroom door firmly shut, she spoke. "Are you okay?"

James blinked, eyes confused behind the glasses that were slipping down his nose. Without thinking, Lily reached up to adjust them on his face. "Me?" He asked quietly, "What about you?"

Lily shrugged, "I'm fine. Used to it, I suppose."

His eyes flashed angrily, "You shouldn't have to be," he growled, before his tone softened, "Sorry. It's just – it's not fair for you. You get all this crap for being Muggleborn at school, and then here you get her rubbish for being a witch."

Letting out a cynical laugh, Lily nodded, "I know. It's bullshit, but what can I do except bear it? She _is_ my sister."

"Not a great one," he muttered, "I know I don't have any real siblings, but I just can't imagine treating Padfoot like that."

"You and Sirius are a special case," Lily pointed out, smiling a little. She noticed that they were holding hands, stood together in the middle of the room as if nothing around them existed. For some reason, it didn't seem awkward at all – it felt natural, even.

"Sorry for blowing up, though," he said, running one hand through his hair nervously, "I know I should have kept my temper."

She thought of the way Petunia spoke to her, the way she was treated because of her magic. "Don't be," she said, "I'm grateful that you stuck up for me."

"I'll always stick up for you," he said, and then smirked, eyes brightening, "What are fake boyfriends for?"

She snorted, and pulled him into a hug, enjoying the sensation of being enveloped by a lanky, warm, nice-smelling James Potter. She didn't think she ever wanted to move from that spot, but eventually they separated, hands hanging uselessly at their sides.

Lily watched as his grin faded, voice lowering. They were so close that she could feel the air from his next words tickling her face. "I meant it, you know. You are one of the best people I know."

"So are you. I know I used to think you were a bit of a –"

"An arrogant toerag?"

She blushed. It was incredible how he remembered that, when she'd said it over a year ago, "A little, yeah. But, well… you're a good guy, really, is what I'm trying to say."

"Cheers, Evans." He smiled again, that lopsided one with the left side of his mouth tugged up just so, and Lily wanted nothing more than to kiss him, so she did.

She pressed her mouth to his, his lips becoming soft and pliant beneath hers as she wound her hands into his messy hair. Somewhere in the back of her mind, a small voice was saying something about how no one was watching, so why were they kissing? Lily didn't care even the tiniest bit; too wrapped up in him and his embrace. James' hands moved to cup her face, thumbs sweeping across her cheeks as he kissed her harder, groaning (a noise that normally would have had Lily embarrassed, but was now just turning her on instead) when she pulled a little on his lower lip with her teeth.

Lily played with the bottom of his t-shirt, tugging at the edges and slipping her fingers underneath to trace the planes of his chest. He shivered against her mouth and she found she couldn't really breathe anymore, because she'd been kissing him for what seemed like years and James clearly had a talent for not needing oxygen when he was snogging her senseless.

So, in spite of her (extremely dirty) thoughts that told her to push him onto the bed and jump him once and for all, she broke away from him, breathing shakily, staring briefly at his Adam's apple before she finally gathered the courage to look him in the eyes.

His pupils were dilated so widely that she could barely see the ring of hazel that was usually behind his glasses. She was certain that she looked the same as he did – hair mussed, lips red and swollen, eyes dark with want – basically, thoroughly kissed.

"Um." He stuttered. She almost laughed – it's not often that James Potter was rendered speechless.

"What was that?" She asked, voice quiet.

"Don't ask me. You kissed me."

"You kissed me back."

He nodded slowly, tongue peeking out to skim briefly over his top lip, and she couldn't help but think about how much she wanted his lips back on hers. "I wanted to."

"So did I," she admitted, "So…"

"Here's the thing, Evans – I like you. A lot. I'm not going to lie, because you're bloody fantastic and smart and funny and I can honestly say that being your fake boyfriend has been an honour."

Lily laughed at this, and he grinned in response. "But," he continued, "I'd prefer it if, well. If I was your real boyfriend."

"You know," Lily said, "I think I'd prefer that too."

* * *

Eventually, Lily persuaded him (by kissing him repeatedly – this form of bribery was clearly _always _going to work) to go downstairs with her, as embarrassed as he was.

"They're going to hate me now though," James insisted as she dragged him out of her door, "And they liked me before."

"Petunia never liked you," Lily pointed out oh-so-helpfully, "And I don't see why it really matters. _I _like you, at least."

"Thanks," he huffed grumpily, but out of the corner of her eye, Lily caught him smiling, and thought that he probably wasn't that fussed about her parents' opinions of him either way.

Mr and Mrs Evans were sat on the sofa when Lily entered the living room, accompanied by a nervous looking James. Her parents turned in unison as they walked in, and James started to mumble an apology.

"It's alright," Mr Evans said, surprising them all. "It's really a good thing, that you're willing to defend our Lily." He smiled (a little wearily, but still) at the pair of them.

"Oh –" said James, taken aback, "Well, I –"

"You probably could have done it a bit quieter, but," Mrs Evans added, before sighing, "Petunia never was one to listen the first time she's told."

"Neither is Lily, to be fair," joked Mr Evans, and just like that, the tension broke. Lily grinned a little, knowing her parents were right – she could be even more stubborn than her sister when she wanted to be.

James cleared his throat after a moment, "I wanted to thank you both for having me; I know I probably should have given some warning."

"Nonsense," said Mrs Evans, smiling and rising from the sofa, "You're always welcome here, James. Anyone who loves Lily as much as we do is."

Lily felt her cheeks burn at this, but said nothing, instead taking James' hand in hers.

"It was good to meet you, James," Mr Evans said, shaking the boy's hand firmly, "See you soon?"

"Yeah," said James, looking away from Lily's dad and to Lily herself, "I reckon you will."

When Mrs Evans had finally stopped fretting over how James was going to get home ("He can Apparate, remember Mum?"), he and Lily made their way to the front hall. Stood in the dimly-lit corridor, Lily watched as he pulled on his leather jacket again, tied his shoelaces and pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose with his forefinger.

She smiled at the familiar action and took his hands, leaning up to press a kiss to his jaw. James bent his head, tugging her closer to him so he could kiss her properly. She threaded her fingers through his hair, letting her eyes fall shut as he nipped lightly at her lower lip.

"Hey, Lily?" He asked, when they separated.

"Hmm?"

He ran a hand through his hair, "Will you go out with me?"

"Considering the fact that we're already dating, I'm going to say yes," she said, beaming.

"Cool," he grinned, "Friday?"

"Friday's good. I'll owl you," she said, and felt a little flutter in her chest at the prospect of going on a date – an actual, non-fake date – with James Potter.

She opened the front door, letting him step outside before they kiss one last time. Lily waved at him awkwardly whilst he walked down the road to Apparate where no Muggles could see him.

As he left, she touched a finger to her lips, still buzzing from their kisses. Lily could only hope that all her arguments with Petunia would come out like this. Then again, she supposed that it was all down to James, really – him and his stellar timing. After all, it's not every day that you get a fake boyfriend and make him your real one.

* * *

**A/N: Hope you liked it! I've been working on this for ages and it's the longest fic I've ever written, so I'd really appreciate any reviews from you :) Thank you to Lily (awkwardholmes on tumblr) for beta reading!**


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